Stretch (Those Dry Stores)

For full effect, please turn your spotify on to "A Song for Our Fathers" by Explosions in the Sky

One of the things that got me really excited about moving to New York was the availability of a huge farmer's market with tons of locally grown and produced foods, wines, and plants. I went last Saturday and scored arugula, local honey (seriously, stop buying the crap in the store, it is but a shadow of what REAL honey tastes like), onions, chevre (goat cheese), purple potatoes, and to boot there was some sort of pot rally going on, and a hare krishna booth. I felt like I walked onto the set of a Hair production. I did spend maybe 20-25$, but the honey and cheese were the most expensive at about 6$ a pop.

hare krishna, hare krishna, krishna krishna, hare hareee!

In addition to this, I've forsaken Whole Foods for a bit in favor of using the farmer's market for fresh produce, and this slapshack spot nearby that is kind of like an Aldi's back in Erie, except they carry a lot of the brands I tend to purchase (like Almond Breeze, Bob's Red Mills). They also have tons of frozen veg (my life source for home meals) and they carry gluten free beer for about as much, if not less, than it is back home. Needless to say, now that the vacation is over, we are not dining out and are a bit rationy.

If I've not mentioned my giant vat of peanut butter before, I'll mention it again. I love it. Like a fat kid loves... peanut butter cake. No bake cookies are one of my favorites, as well as any other combination of peanut butter and chocolate. I'm pretty sure I gained this affection for the two while in the womb, as my mum and I go bonkers for Reese's and other concoctions. I made a batch of these pups all vegan and gluten free to enjoy with my glutard beer. Heaven. Now the problem is I can't stop eating them...

Glutard Vegan No Bakes

 

2 cups sugar
2 oz baking chocolate (usually vegan, especially the cheap stuff)
1/2 cup coconut oil
1/2 cup almond milk
1 cup peanut butter
1 tablespoon vanilla
3 cups oatmeal
Waxed paper or Foil

In a small pot, melt the coconut oil, sugar, chocolate, and milk together. Bring to a simmer. 

Then add the peanut butter and vanilla. 

In a decently large bowl filled with your oats, pour in the bubbling mass of chocolatey peanut butter goodness. Do not lick the spoon, it's like napalm... trust me. 

Mix together your gooey mass and spoon onto parchment or foil, and try to allow them to cool as long as you can resist. I also added cinnamon to mine. Cause it's good. Once cooled they can be stored wherever because they're not going to hang around long. 

 

For when you are lazy... never forget the dry stores.

 

Edamame Ragout with Rice spirals.

Rice Pasta (cook according to directions)

Thawed edamame

Tamari

Try not to suck at photography because you're impatient to eat it.

Liquid smoke

Coconut oil

Thawed "Parisian Blend" vegetable mix, or whatever frozen veg you have on hand

Thawed spinach

1 Half a can of tomato puree

Oregano

Basil

Garlic granules

Black pepper

Salt

 

Daiya Mozzarella

In a small non stick skillet, melt some coconut oil (like 1-2 tsp) and one it is hot add the edamame. Be sure to pat them dry or they steam instead of searing. Give them a few flips to brown them, and then squirt some liquid smoke and tamari on them and let the liquids reduce. Remove from heat and set aside.

Heat up your tomato puree in either a large non stick skillet (I really just wanted an excuse to use the ones I had just purchased from Sur la Table) or sauce pot. Add veggies and edamame. Season with herbs and salt and pepper. Ideally you want fresh, but since we're being bohemian here, dried is acceptable... but do be sure to feel guilty about it.

Place your pasta in a bowl, top with sauce/veg "ragout" or pick some other fancy name to fool yourself that you're actually eating something that's not a hodgepodge. Top with fake vegan cheese or reg. cheese for your partner (cause it's just not fair having food allergies sometimes). Proceed to inhale.

 

I. Love. BaoHaus.

Clockwise: Apple Sidra, Taro Fries, Uncle Jesse tofu bao. Heaven.

Sometimes, it's okay to cheat... so long as you go to the farmer's market afterwards and compensate by buying stuff that you'll cook at home later. Taro fries are seriously, mind blowingly delicious.

Blackened Tofu + Balsamic Arugula + Escabeche + Sticky Rice

Many people hate tofu. I know, don't lie, it's cool. You just had it bad one time that some f-ing hippie made it for you and it had no seasoning on it, and was all slippery, and bland. Freezing tofu totally changed the texture. The ice crystals make these little matrices and it has a texture akin to a chicken pattie (maybe that's because those patties have so much soy in them... something to think about), making ideal for tofu salads or other frying applications. Just try it, and if you hate it, okay, you can hate tofu.

Rice is also another one of those gems, like beans, that you can make a big batch ahead and eat it throughout the week. Heck, if you're going to make fried rice I RECOMMEND you use day old rice. Having lost a lot of its moisture it will fry up nicely and un-clump easier.

1 cup water
1 cup rice, rinsed 3 times til the water runs clear. Let sit until it turns opaque again.

In a small pot, rice + water. Cover with a lid and bring to a boil. Reduce to the lowest possible setting for about 10 minutes. Turn heat off and allow to sit.

For the tofu,

tamari
smoke seasoning
marmite
water

smoked paprika
african bird pepper
thyme
black pepper
salt
basil
garlic granules

Make a marinade with the first four ingredients. It should be salty as sea water. You don't have to add Marmite but I like the umami it adds. Cut (a 14oz brick) of tofu into 1/2" slabs and submerge in marinade for about 25 minutes.

Meanwhile, mix together the spices with 3 parts paprika, 3 parts herbs, and fill in the blanks after that. Go easy on the spice, it will get spicier as it sits. Keep the mix in a glass jar because the paprika will not only stink up plastic with smoke smell forever, but it also has the tendency to stain. If you have a cast iron skillet, this is the best, but I chose to use my new non sticks. Heat up your pan, and meanwhile shake some out onto a plate and dip your tofu pieces covering all sides in the spice mix. Place in a DRY pan and cook til it has some black spots, kind of roasted like.

For the salad,

Place arugula in a separate bowl, drizzle with balsamic, lemon olive oil, and season with salt and pepper. Toss.

To assemble,

Rice in the bottom of the bowl, arugula on one side, slab o' tofu, and your "escabeche". Pour on some extra soy or dijon mustard if you feel frisky.  

because Glenlivet isn't just for old men, and is suitable for Cinco de Mayo.